Dwight D. Eisenhower was the Allied Commander in charge of launching the attacks of D-Day during World War II. His success in that invasion would ultimately lead to victory over the Axis forces of Nazi and Japanese soldiers. As much as we admire his courage, preparation, and clarity of thinking when we look back at it now, at the time, the outcome was very much in doubt. No one knew if the invasion at Normandy would succeed. So much so, that Eisenhower composed a brief letter to submit to the president in case the invasion didn’t succeed. The note read,

“Our landings in the Cherbourg-Havre area have failed to gain a satisfactory foothold and I have withdrawn the troops. My decision to attack at this time and place was based upon the best information available. The troops, the air and the Navy did all that Bravery and devotion to duty could do. If any blame or fault attaches to the attempt it is mine alone.”

The quality of Eisenhower as a leader was on display not only in his successes, but in the way he was filling to face failure. We can learn valuable lessons from his example as we face the inevitable failures that we occur in our lives.

Don’t Make Excuses

There are always extenuating circumstances present when we fail. There are always things beyond our control that contribute to our outcomes. Sometimes our failure is brought about by the failure of others. It’s easy to make excuses, to blame others when things go wrong. Even if there is room for blame however, we must avoid it at all costs. Blame is toxic for everyone involved. Eisenhower was not willing to blame others (although he could have). He was ready to bear the full weight of the failure if the mission did not succeed. He even went out of his way to complement those under him, assuming the best, that they would handle themselves well.

Don’t Belittle Yourself

If the mission had failed, it would not have meant that Eisenhower was a bad leader. In his willingness to accept responsibility for the failure if it would have occurred, he never badmouthed himself. You are more than your performance, and a bad performance doesn’t make you a bad person. If you crush yourself every time something goes wrong, you will soon lose heart and struggle in whatever you attempt.

Own It and Move On

Eisenhower’s assumption of responsibility was short, clear, and to the point. There is nothing to be gained by wallowing in our failures. We need to own the failure, accept whatever consequences that may come, and then move on to the next challenge.

Failing is miserable, even in small things. But the way we handle our failures will go a long way to determine our success in the future. Everyone fails, but those who face it courageously are better able to handle the next challenge that life brings to them.

The post Transforming Failure Into Growth first appeared on Michael Ramsey.

My wife and I are big fans of Louise Penny’s mystery novels that center around the small Canadian town of Three Pines. They are great reads, and I highly recommend them. The main character in the novels, Inspector Gamache tells those he trains that there are four phrases that will make them great detectives. They are:

“I was wrong”

“I am sorry”

“I don’t know” and

“I need help”

I am not sure what makes for a good detective, but these concise, powerful phrases will absolutely make your relationships stronger. These phrases are so helpful, that I’ve decided to dedicate a blog post to each of them. Let’s begin with the phrase, “I was wrong”.

It’s hard to imagine a simpler statement that is any harder to say than this one. Normally, when we do get up the courage to say, “I was wrong”, it is followed by a bunch of other stuff, like:

I was wrong…but if you hadn’t said what you said, I wouldn’t have said something hurtful.

I was wrong…but it wasn’t really my fault

I was wrong…but you’ve done lots of wrong things too

When we try to explain away or rationalize why we were wrong, it strips the admission of its power.  Simply and humbly admitting that we were wrong has several benefits:

It Sets Us Free From Our Perfectionistic Tendencies

You are not perfect, and neither am I. Also, no one in their right mind would ever expect us to be perfect. Perfection isn’t possible, but we need to be reminded of that from time to time. Admitting that we were wrong about something allows us to catch our breath and remember that we can’t be right all of the time. When we no longer demand perfection of ourselves, we are able to try to be our best, which is attainable.

It Sets Others Free To Admit When They Are Wrong

When you admit that you were wrong, others are more likely to admit when they are wrong. Humility is powerful. It allows relationships to be more authentic. We are all wrong sometimes. Healthy people admit it.

It Sets You Free To Improve

Admitting you were wrong allows you to let go of the past and focus on new solutions or opportunities. When we refuse to admit when we are wrong, we dig our heels into a place that we don’t really want to be. It’s not good for anyone. When we finally admit that we were wrong, a whole world of options and alternatives become available for us to explore. Admitting that you are wrong is the first step to getting it right.

So, the next time you are wrong about something, take a deep breath and admit it. It will make you stronger, and will lead others to trust you more as well.

The post I Was Wrong first appeared on Michael Ramsey.

The post Leadership Is A Relationship first appeared on Michael Ramsey.